Moving on for Angel's Flare

Since it's the last day of the year, I would be closing this blog for another blog. Wala lang, para maiba naman. I hope in my next blog, there would be less heartaches. At sana dumating na ang hinihintay ko. LoL. Here's my next blog:

The Hunger Games Trilogy: sad, dark and tragic, but still...

I love it so much.

 

But before I say anything else, there are SPOILERS ahead, so If you haven't read the trilogy yet and don't want to know what happened, then don't read...

Okay... I readily fell in love with the first book despite the dark theme. It was well written and the characters and the storyline were very promising. Even from the start, it felt like it would be leaving a great impression to the reader. And it actually did to me.

I was very engrossed with the story up to the point that I hated the Capitol and President Coin so much. And then when I learned that Katniss and Peeta would participate again in the Hunger Games for the Quarter Quell, I almost threw the book at the wall, not because of hatred but of frustration. I was very frustrated because I found it very unfair and inhumane. Haha, see I was very in to it.

 Actually, the epilogue cheered me up despite the very sad ending of the book. It was filled with hope and was very heartwarming, which made me cry more. I'm saying it's sad because of the too many deaths that happened. I know they were in a war and that deaths happen in wars. But it was too much for me.

The first death that really shocked me was Cinna. I don't know but, I really, really like him. He was one of the first persons that believed in Katniss. That's why I was very disappointed when he died. I was actually hoping that he wasn't killed until they confirmed that he was killed.

Another was Finnick. Actually, when Katniss's companions were dying one after the other, while they were being chased by mutts I was like hoping that Finnick would survive since he's like one of the main characters in the story and that he should see their victory  at the end. But no... Finnick! Oh, for heaven's sake. Why should Finnick die? Poor Annie. The only redeeming part was that he was able to leave Annie a son.

And then there was Prim! Every single thing happened because of Prim. Because Katniss volunteered for Prim's place. But then, it was decided that Prim would die and in a horrible way. Poor Prim. Poor Katniss and her mother. Prim did not die in the games. But she died in the war while trying to save those poor children.

The problem here is that, the book will make you love those characters. And then when you love them too much already, they die. Actually, I was a bit prepared already with the deaths since the first book, because it says that the Hunger Games would only end until only one survives. I was saddened with Rue's death and I was like crying so much, but she has to die. At least it wasn't Katniss or Peeta who killed her. But I wasn't prepared for the likes of Finnick, Cinna and Prim to die. When they died, it felt like I don't care anymore who else will die next. Maybe Katniss and Peeta would also die. Anyway, too much tragedy...

What I need is the dandelion in the spring. 

The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. 

The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. 

That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that.

 Okay, about the love story part... At first I was in Team Gale. And then at the middle, I was converted into Team Peeta. It's just that Peeta is more honest than Gale. Gale only started to move when he had already lost Katniss and he did not actually pursued her much. I hated Katniss for the first parts because she wouldn't admit about her feelings. But I pity her when Peeta was like brain-washed. Anyway, I don't know why, but I like those kind of love stories. Those stories wherein one would forget about his/her love and then the partner will do everything to make his/her lover remember him/her again. And then even though the one who forgot couldn't remember anything about their  love, deep inside, there's a part of him/her that could still vaguely remember. It just shows that their love was so great and true. And I so love those kind of stories.

So after, when he whispers, "You love me. Real or not real?"

I tell him, "Real."

Sabi ko na, bawal ako mag-straight

Grabe, na-sampolan ako dahil medyo kababalik ko lang galing VL. Stat CS, TAHBSO at Pelvic Lap. Sa partner ko yung CS akin yung PL pati TAHBSO dapat. Kaya lang grabe yung nangyari sa PL. Nag-code kami, nag CPR, nag-bigay ng 10 Epi, BT, Gelofusine, CVP... Grabe, 2nd time ko na yun makakita pero tulala pa rin ako. Siguro kasi hindi ko alam kung anong role ba dapat ang i-assume ko. Nung una, pag-akyat nya, super ok pa sya. Hindi pa ganun ka-toxic ang itsura nya aside from mababang BP. At dahil 10 years pa ang blood, nag-tiis sa Gelofusine. Nag-unstable kaya nag-intubate. Hanggang sa nag-patawag na nga Medicine. Pero syempre tuloy pa rin ang operasyon. Evacuate ng clots, suction ng dugo. Hanggang  sa tuluyan nang bumagsak ang BP. Ayun, hindi na namin nahabol and blood kahit na pinu-push na. Hypovolemic shock and nangyari. Sabi nila siguro may heart problem din ang  patient kasi hindi kinaya ang pag-brady at pagbagsak ng BP kaya baka daw Cardiogenic na rin.

Grabe ang mga papel. Kalat-kalat sa station. Hindi ko alam kung pano uumpisahan. Buti na lang may 2 tumulong sakin. Natapos ko rin kasi straight ako. Kaya ayaw ko talaga ng straight. Ang toxic kasi. Sa una kahit toxic, may partner ka naman. Tapos pag dating ng gabi, salo mo pa rin lahat tapos mag-isa ka na. Pag-pray mo na lang na sana maayos ang mga kasama mo para medyo matulungan ka kahit paano.

Nawala Lahat

Sakit lang ng ulo ang natira sa kin after ng exam ko. Grabe as in naaasar na ako kanina. Kakaiba yung mga tanong. Hindi ko lam kung san galing lahat yun. Parang nasayang lang lahat ng naaral ko... kung meron man. Hahaha... As in nung lumampas na ng 100 ayaw ko na. Bahala na.  Hindi ko na kaya. Ang sakit na ng ulo ko.

Tapos after syempre dapat masaya na ko. Kaso feeling ko parang na-drain lahat ng energy ko. Diba ang plano ko JGS kaagad ang aatupagin ko. Kaso bigla akong tinamad. Imbis na tapusin ko ang MSOAN, nanood ako ng anime. Hahaha... At naka-dalawa pa ako. At nag-basa ng Hunger Games. Ang cute pa rin nya kaya lang parang naubos and enthusiasm ko.

Waiting patiently...

Ilang oras na lang at matatapos na. I'm not sure kung anong magiging result pero I'm trying to stay positrive. Sana kayanin ko. Ang dami-dami nang nakapila sa mga gagawin ko. Kating-kati na akong manood ng mga korean drama at bagong anime; keep-up with new manga chapters with the series that I'm reading; read new books like The Hunger Games series at Clockwork Angel; Mag-full time Jang Geun Suk fan-girl mode...

Haha kala mo ang dami kong oras para gawin lahat yan. Pero kaya ko pag-sabay-sabayin lahat yan.

Konting oras na lang ang aantayin ko. Sana po maging maayos. At sana po maganda ang result. Thanks po!

I thought I'd forget you, But I guess I forgot to.

In short, umasa nanaman ang baliw. Pano, we were together last Christmas Party. Picture, party, kain, inom, kwento. Kahit na alam kong wala na akong pag-asa, parang kahit pano meron pa ring gustong umasa. Nakakaasar kasi may mga pictures kami together. Tapos may nag-sasabi na bagay daw kami. Tapos yung mga asaran at laitan namin, swak pa rin. Grabe na-miss ko sya. Kaya lang ano namang mapapala ko kung pbaalik-balik? Nakakaasar talaga. Gusto ko na kasi talagang kalimutan. Pero pag andyan na, wala na... Back to zero ulet. Haaayyyysssttt...

Anyway, enjoy naman ang party pati after party. Yun nga lang hindi na ako sumama sa isa pang after party kasi pupunta pa akong Makati kinabukasan tapos duty sa afternoon. 

Feeling ko hindi na to mawawala. Mukang aasa na lang ako palagi.

I want to escape reality and be with JGS

Yes, JGS as in Jang Geun Suk! I'm feeling quite anxious right now because of what happened with my vacation request and my exam on the 15th. Today is our Christmas Party but I'm feeling anxious because I would be returning to work tomorrow afternoon. I was very excited about it before but because of what happened with my schedule, I'm no longer happy about it. And the only thing that could make me happy right now is Jang Geun Suk! 

Waah, I'm on fan-girl mode again. Why is he so gorgeous? I soooo love his character Kang Moo Kyul in Mary Stayed  Out All Night. I also love what is happening in the drama. Lam mo nah, yun yung mga type ko. Selosan kasi ayaw umamin. Pero ngayon umamin na kaya ayun super kilig. Grabe ang gwapo talaga ni Jang Geun Suk. Kaasar. Bakit ba ang gwapo nya? Yan tuloy adik na naman ako. 

Huhu, matapos lang ang talaga ang 15 sasaya na ulit ako. Wait for me JGS ok? Full time fan girl ulit ako after ng exam ko sa 15. Leche. Bakit ba ang daming balakid? Sige bright side na lang. At least afternoon ako. Tapos siguro sabi ni Lord, tutal naman kung anu-ano lang inaaatupag ko, mag-trabaho na lang daw ako. Baka may matutunan pa ako. Hindi rin naman kasi ako makaaral ng super tuluy-tuloy kasi nasa harap ako ng computer. Ang daming distractions. Dapat nga di pa muna ako manood ng MSOAN kaya lang di ko matiis ang cuteness ni JGS. Grabe escaping reality talaga ako. Waaaah... Matapos ka na 15 please?

 Anak ng... Nalintikan na. Sooooo freaking adorable... ♥♥♥